Confessions of a Retail Specialist

When in life do we give up thinking people are smart or even mildly intelligent and start treating others that we don't know as if they are someone who can't understand the language we are speaking? Truly the more experience we have with people it is hard to differentiate between someone needing a hand, a person trying to get their way, and someone that should be on governmental aid and should have live in assistance; really no judgment here. I realize that sometimes things need to be explained to others, we all have our personal area of expertise. Also at times we may need to find a way to get what we want and need and at times, god forbid, we may need to ever so slightly to manipulate a circumstance by getting some help in reaching our end goal. I feel there is a fine line between stupidity and downright ill-intention though. For instance, a waiter announcing "Hot plate" isn't trying to make the diner feel compelled to touch the plate and burn themselves. And since he knows that you were able to place an order for hot food items served on dishes there should be no confusion about how the food is served. "Hot plate" isn't stated because he thinks we are unaware that isn't the first thing that goes through our mind. It isn't so much that we doubt that the plate is hot; we know he isn't lying. Personally I touch the plate to prove that I can!! I'm not the pansy boy who can’t stand the heat. Logically it’s a liability and safety issue that encourages them to say "Hot plate" And now it occurs to me that I am the reason for "Hot plate" But I digress.

Do we merely give up the effort of explaining what we want and what we are looking for or need and why? Is it conscious choices we make to get others do what we want so we chose to sound stupid and uniformed? We say I don't know how to do something, I can't figure this out, what would you pick for me or ask for suggestions when we are fully aware of what we want but we want the other person to do it for us or get it for us. I have worked in the beauty industry for a long time. And I will say that I am sure that many women truly do not know how to do their makeup and need some beauty advice, I get it. I think that a person should just ask for what they want be straight forward and honest. Let’s say the women mentioned before did really need help and maybe not even intend to buy more make up; really who needs a new gloss. Ask for a lesson for Christ sake. But that doesn't happen and I start playing mind games with myself and I have to wonder, am I being unfair? Is this a person in need of help for real? Because it’s cruel to ignore the makeup challenged in need of advice. We have all seen that person that doesn’t seem to won a mirror because god knows she wouldn’t have left the house like that. Or does this person just want something for free from me, am I being manipulated? When did we get to the point that we automatically presume the worst in people; that the individual in front of us asking for help actually doesn’t needs it? When will we pay attention to the woman running away from a scary man yelling for help for 12 blocks and realize that she really does need a hand. We are a moment away from not believing that we are having an Earth quake as buildings are falling down around us.

As a person that deals with the mass public on a consistent basis, I find that in order to avoid a head ache I must fall back on the "Hot plate" mind set and think the best of the person in front of me, forcing myself to form no judgments about them and maintaining my willingness to patiently explain and help out. It's just a little easier to think people are stupid. Taking them at face value and explaining everything like I'm speaking to a toddler, than deal with the exhaustion resulting from the battle of wits that no one ever, EVER wins. Where your try to convince the other person that you know what they are doing without having to say it to them and maybe you'll be able to make them just go the hell away! A conversation you find yourself playing over, over in your head reassuring yourself that you had made you're point quite well, and it was a good and logical point, surely the other person understood what you were saying, and they knew that you were right and they were wrong too. Right? No; why do you ask I've never ever had that conversation. Remember, I think the best of other people... really I do.

Dear LIFE, This is What You've Done to Me

I do everything too much I just take turns with what it is I do too much. I don't believe in Puppies and Babies, the only thing more disgusting is licking a park bench, which is likely to happen with the subjects mentioned. I don't do drama, can't stand it. I do enjoy gossip though, I just like being informed. I have more tolerance for the slow than the lazy. I will not tame my words to be easier to hear. I will explain them. I have a bad habit of ordering one more drink and eating all the cheese. I think a difference of opinion is the best thing that can be encountered. I strive not to drive because I don't want to be prison raped, due to the incarceration from a possible DUI. Every now and then I think "what would this person do if I kissed them." Not in a normal moment, but in the middle of them talking about their job or hummus, you know just randomly. Not even someone I'm attracted to. Or hit them with my car that's always a favorite to. But this does bring me back to the prison rape. I want to start eating and never stop. I used to let the little fat boy in me shop, but the old man tells me that it is getting expensive. I wish I could be addicted to something healthy. It's always diet pills, drinking or hating myself. Now that I've hit that scary level I'll tell ya I believe in myth and magic and dream of finding a fairy all of my own one day.

I spend a lot of time watching movies and working. And that is a pleasant change from being trapped in my own head thinking about the catastrophe that my life has become. I enjoy anything that involves a little escapism. I'm into my job and developing my future, in my 30s I've come to want more. Whatever that may be, like more time, another cup of coffee or another hour before work. I love a night, and early morning, out on the town. I find though that when I do that it takes me a while now to get back to normal. What ever happened to being able to bounce back and have an easy day at work, instead I want to die to get out of this body and clear my head, regain focus, make a time machine go back and never drink that much in the first place! Music with a bottle of wine and a sharp cheese used to be a recipe for a good time, now I think of the indigestion that will cripple me for hours. LIFE it just never stop! It seems like when I get all my balls in the air another one drops into my lap. Is it wrong that I want to take the sole of a teenager to turn back my internal clock to my early 20s again? A little bit of child sacrifice never hurt anyone. I need to start movie night again. I also need to start being a drunk again, if only to catch up with my friends. Alas still no time machine. Is there an AA for being for too much sobriety? Because I don't feel right yet. Isn't supposed to all be in place by now?